Menu of the day

Today is the first day boss went to Japan. I overslept but managed to get to work on time..... Had 2 coffee in the morning and went into the cleanroom to do my own data collection. My colleague asked me why I had to do all this myself when I have so many assistants.... Guess I had only myself to blame.... I choose my own assistants, speak up for them in front of my boss but what did I get at the end of the day....??? Utterly disappointed..... All along I only had one objective in mind, not to let anyone look down on our group. To prove that we are capable and knows our job better than anyone. But now I gave up... its totally out of what I can do alone. Perhaps they don't really care or can't sense the current situation.... As long as they get their paycheck on time, get to joke and laugh, it doesn't even matter how people view them. I'm strict with them hoping they will learn along the way but in the end, I became the public enemy .... Is it all worth it..... Even if I had to work 20 hrs a day, I will do every single data collection myself from today onwards. Now I am bend on leaving after Dec. It really break my heart seeing the group getting worse each day. I worked so hard in the past to let people who looked down on us in the past changed their thinking about us. I read up on technical notes every night till dawn... Finally people feel that we do have the knowledge to do the job but now.....

Lunch for the day was 5 panadols.... follow by another 3 panadols for tea break... by the time I left the office its 10.30pm. Another 14 hrs of work today. I vomitted the moment I had my first mouth of dinner or rather supper. Gave up dinner and took another 5 panadols.....

Hope I am really dying soon. Maybe only when I don't see, don't hear will I don't feel the pain. My weight is dropping faster than the shares during economic crisis. 73kg to 64kg in a month.... I guess the next thing I will do is to crush the panadol into powder form, mix with water and inject straight into my body.