Family Secret

Today is grandma's 2nd 7th day death anniversay, we went o the temple early in the morning to make our prayer and offerings. On the tablet, I saw grandpa's name, grandma's name & another name which I have never heard of. My brother told me that actually we have an uncle whom passed away when he was about 3 years old. He was the third child in the family. When he passed away, grandma burnt away all his photo and threw away everything related to him. Of all the siblings, only dad and my first aunt knew his existance but no one was allowed to mentioned about him. Until now that grandma passed away did dad tell my aunties about it. For more than 50 years, no one made any prayer or offerings to him. Only when now that we make the tablet did dad decided to put his name beside my grandparents. I can't understand why grandma has never mentioned about him all these years, maybe she want to put the past and move on...... What exactly happened that caused them to totally forget about having a son.... I am sure grandpa still think of him and missed him as he ever mentioned to his god-daughter once that he used to have another son but passed away when he was young. Thats's all he mentioned and nothing more in detail. No one knew how he die or where he is buried. Dad doesn't know about it in detail too as he was very young then. I am very surprised that my grandparents kept this secret for more than 50 years. I guess I will never find any answer to the question in my heart.....

Hatred

Last saturday when I was on the way to work, I was greeted by 'Uncle Sam' on the highway. He gave me an early 'Christmas present' of 8 points off my driving license and $170 fine..... Sight... This is the first time in my 8 years of riding/driving that I got demerit points.... Not a really good way to end 2007 isn't it??

Now that both my grandparents have passed away and just when I thought things have finally settled down.... my youngest aunt is starting to fight for the money. Previously grandpa left about $100K behind when he passed away. My dad and aunties set the money for my grandma daily expense and now that she had passed away too, my youngest aunt want to have a share of the remaining money and the flat left behind by grandpa to dad. Everyone love money but for someone who live in a landed property and having a monthly income of more than $10K a month fighting for the money, I really believes that greed is not only limited to the poor. The poor want to get rich while the rich want to get richer.

When grandpa passed away, my brother, cousin and me have already decided to draw a clear line with my youngest aunt. We strongly believe she is the one who drive my grandpa to his grave... A few years ago while I was working as a hawker with dad, grandpa visited us at our stall and told us that he is going to commit suicide after seeing dad for one last time as my youngest aunt brought my then senile grandma to church to be baptised without informing him. At that time we hold on to him and promise to stop my youngest aunt from doing so. Then begining of this year, when grandpa just returned from oversea she told him that she wanted to sent grandma to old folks home immediately as she feels that she is a burden. Since the day she sent grandma to old folks home, grandpa stopped eating and fell sick. Soon after he was sent to the hospital and never get to step out of the hospital anymore..... If grandpa hasn't listened to grandma & agreed to moving in with her to help her look after her house, dog and maid, he would still be alive today...


May she have a Merry Christmas burning in hell

Aunty Agony

A friend once asked after reading through my blog that why are most my post about sad stuff happening in my life? I guess my purpose of writing here is to find a place to keep the sad part of my life. In every one's life, there are bound to be sad and happy moments and different ways to handle it. Some choose to share their happy moment with friends or cry on their friend's shoulder over sad moments while I choose to pour it all out through writing.

At times I wish to vent my anger, cry over sad things happening around me but over the years I learnt to kept it all inside till recently I started my blog where I let it out here. When I was in secondary school, I have the habbit of writing diary every night before I go to bed then when I graduate from secondary school, I burnt away.... reason?? I can't recall to....

Anyway what I wanna sad is my life isn't really that sad, its just that whenever I feel down, I will write it out thats all.

Good Bye Grandma

A few hrs ago, I was woke up by my dad. The Old Folk Home called and want us to go down to see my grandmother immediately. Before we could reach her room, I heard my aunties crying and I know she is gone.....

Sometimes back, one of my aunts dreamt of my grandfather whom passed away a few months back. In her dream, my grandfather told her to buy a pair of shoes for him and a pair for my grandmother. The next day she bought 2 pairs, burnt 1 pair and kept the other. I guess my grandfather is trying to tel her that he will be taking my grandmother away soon.... Every one in the family knows that even when my grandfather was very sick, grandma was his main worries so maybe after he passed away, he still worried for her being alone at the old folk home so .....

Just a week ago, I visited her for the first time at the old folk home after my grandfather passed away. Although she was senile but she could recognise me and even call out my name. This morning when my aunt visited her, she was looking fine and now she left us..... My brother just left for HongKong last night... Guess he will have to shorten his trip and be back tomorrow at earliest available flight.

Right now my parents are at the void deck waiting for the undertaker to send my grandmother back..... This seems to be a bad month, I have went to a few funeral and received news of my friend's father passed away this morning and now...

Family Day

Finally I get to take a break from work today and spend time with my family. Washed my car in the morning, its already turning from white to grey with all the dirt building on it... Haiz... thats the way it is working at Tuas.. always full of dust....

Visit my grandmother with my parents at the old folk home... My grandmother seems to forget that my grandfather has passed away... She told the other folks at the home that my grandfather is at Malaysia. Maybe its a good thing that she had forgotten or maybe she choose not to accept the truth... She can still recognise me and my parents, this shows that she still hasn't lost her memory competely... Stayed with her for a while and then we headed down to boatquay for dinner... Been a long time since we had dinner together but too bad my brother didn't join us as he was busy meeting up wth some contractor discussing about renovating his house. After so many years.. finally he is about to settle down next year. Though he is already in his 30s but still behave like a kid at times... always crazy about games and having fun... Hope he will be more mature after his marriage.

Mm... its back to work again tomorrow.. feel so lazy and tired....