Fight against life, you will never win

Its been a long time since I seriously workout on my sandbag. By the time I removed my gloves, my knuckles were swollen & bleeding. Looks like its gonna take some time before I get my delicate skin seasoned again.

Looked at myself for a long time in the mirror in the shower..... I saw myself as a kid, saw myself as a teenager and now..... I realised that I have really changed alot over the years but did I become who I wished to be or did I blindly climb the coporate ladder without knowing where I am heading or what I actually want... This evening, I sat at my desk staring at the laptop for a long time, I felt very tired inside out.... My mind went blank....

No matter how powerful or smart a person is, he or she can never outsmart or fight against life. In some part of our lives, we lost what thought we will have forever & at some point of life, we found what we thought we had lost forever.... All these are far beyond our control even the most power man on earth has no control over..... Many times, I wish to give up everything & live a simple life somewhere where I don't have to be on guard against anyone.

I am who I am because of my own choice or because of circumstance? One thing I am very sure, I didn't become who I wanted to be when I grow up. I remember I told my dad that I wanted to be a musican, a saxophonist when I grow up. Even when my dad went bankrupt, I never give up my dream. I did everything I could to get in SP just to be in the band so that I could continue with my dream but eventually I had to give it up because I couldn't cope with my school work. Was that consider my own choice or was it circumstance that changed my dream?